Our last moments.

I turn on this song, close my eyes, and see it. I see you, standing there, pulling me out of bed- giving me a memory that I cherish preciously. https://youtu.be/Vl7spqkXgpY Our last night together. I was exhausted, painfully exhausted from another year of Adopt a Classroom. You tucked me in for a nap that afternoon... Continue Reading →


Feel it. Touch it.

You can't imagine getting a call that will bring you to your knees, gasping for air. You can't imagine hardly being able to speak or walk because you know when you get to the top of the stairs, you have to explain the phone call. You can't imagine hearing the words "He's dead". You can't... Continue Reading →

Missing the Simplicity

Every single day, I ask the "simple" question of "why me?". I cry out to God with desperation and misunderstanding of why me? Of why us? Why them? As my head hits my hands daily and the palms of my hands fill with a puddle of water, I cry out to God, begging for an... Continue Reading →

Painful Realizations.

Coming back to the College of Charleston this semester, I anticipated hard, but I didn't anticipate this hard. In one week-7 days- 168 hours- I have realized more then I want to, more then I ever thought I would and more then I feel as though I ever needed to realize, especially at the age... Continue Reading →

Where to Begin.

I’ve been sitting, staring at this blank page for weeks- thinking of what part of this horrible, difficult tragedy I wanted to share, what I needed to get out of my system and I just can't figure it out. I don't know where to begin, where to heal, where to start. Should I share how... Continue Reading →

My Darkest Night

This is an incredibly difficult post for me to write and especially for me to share but for me, for my healing, I need to share my deepest darkness, my helplessness, and my pain. 6 months later and I couldn't tell you what stage of grief I'm in, how broken my heart truly is, or how very... Continue Reading →

Touch the Sky

The past 6 months, I look back at the pain I’ve faced. I look back at the moments of complete desperation I've faced and still face today, I think of the countless times I’ve fallen to the ground- in private and in public screaming and crying, pounding my fist into the ground or at a... Continue Reading →

Silent Pain.

As I prepared myself for the wedding I was in this past weekend, my heart would race, my breath would grow short, and my mind would spin as I thought of putting on my bridesmaids dress, putting a smile on my face, and facing that long walk down the aisle- a walk in my mind,... Continue Reading →

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